Why Brothers In Church Often Get Married To Sisters from a Different Location or Congregation

Here is a topic I really want to address:
“Why Brothers In Church Often Get Married To Sisters from a Different Location or Congregation.”

Talking about getting married to a person is often a thing of hearts comprising of a myriad of factors to be carefully considered by both parties involved.

While some of the considerations to be made involves important questions such as:
~ “Am I attracted in anyway to this person?”
~ “What spiritual, family, educational or institutional backgrounds have they been exposed to in the process of their growth?”
~ “What is their belief system as regards the gospel and the entirety of heaven and hell?”

Some other questions might come in the form of more benign inquisition into their personal beliefs, convictions or even tendencies such as:
~ “Is handwork necessary?”
~ “Is it appropriate to watch movies 12 hours every day and never plan or work?”
~ “Should I brush my teeth in the morning before work or after all the day’s work is done?”

In this same light, other crucial questions arise amongst singles like us in churches and congregations alike.

Some of these questions take many forms which includes such as our topic of consideration today.

It say: “Why would Brothers In My Church Often Get Married To Sisters from a Different Location or Congregation whereas there are many available and qualified sisters within this same congregation.”

While there exists many lights in which we could consider the answers to this one question, there is a predominant trend I have noticed with regards to singles in various churches including ours and shall want to address by means of this article.

It is true that just like brothers and sisters from same parents, we start out in congregations such as ours, feeding from same spiritual prants and therefore holding similar ideologies on both spiritual and procedural beliefs when talking about marriage.

The truth however is that marriage often goes beyond the direct spiritual perceptions of a set of church ideals or norms as assumed by young minds of what the norms should be.

For example, while a lot of us, the young men are intentional about investing, saving funds, and working hard towards our dreams, in bette hopes of a brighter tomorrow, bearing in mind that in the near future we could approach a female church member with interests in marriage to them, most of the ladies in church do not see things that way.

As a matter of fact, most ladies in church see the upcoming young men who do not already have cars or properties as financially incompetent.

This can lead to them subconsciously labelling such young men as unaccomplished fellows, possibly, even “suffering” young men and would not willingly consider us worthy partners for them.

In such a situation, the young man does all he can to make the lady know he cares.
He walks up to her, makes known his interest, becomes friends, get’s her things, talks of his intentions but then immediately gets somehow downplayed because the sister in question has her eyes and focus on another brother that just bought the latest car in Church.

You know, this sister has seen you at your highs and lows, down times and really hard times, good times and very bad times.

So if you tell her about marriage and you do not have a car yet or other material things such as houses yet, you are joking.

So most sisters would be like: “Is it this brother Matthew that walks the whole of Enugu on just a pair of Jean trousers and two corporate shirts that is coming to talk to me about interest in me?”

And: “I suppose somebody should first of all feed himself and his family or at least take two square meals a day before coming to propose to someone else.”

“Brother Matthew is not just serious.”

“He wants to come and marry me and keep me in the same hunger strike with him.”

They don’t know the investments you are making now, the knowledge you are building and the experience that makes a man in the fields of expertise and money making.

Everything worthwhile takes time.
But they first would want to see the end before the beginning. Laughs out loud!

And so it’s all about the padded brothers who isn’t even within their reach.

But those guys also passed through this same roadblocks and are now well padded.

When they were trying to make an impression on the sisters in church and declare their interest, the sisters weren’t just paying attention at all.
They had their gaze on the guy with the best and poshest car in Church.

Until brother Matthew visits another branch of church or even another church, meets a sister who shows him real interest, believes in even the dreams he almost neglected, encourages him when he’s down, even gives him a little help when he is in need and that, without the insult that comes with it.

Then, one day, he gets a dream idea from all these years of experience, implements it, gets invested in or lands a new jobs that changes his story.

And then he starts building investments, and then finally gets a nice poshy car to relieve stress and make life more enjoyable….. Booom!

Suddenly, brother Matthew now exists!

All the sisters that shunned him when he approached them and they acted towards him like a nobody begins to flock around him, expecting him to say “I do”.

Well?

What most ladies in church really don’t know is that a brother knows when to pick someone who isn’t just there for the money.

The times you snuffed at us and laughed at us after we had just walked up to you to declare our interests and you told your friends jokingly about how naive we must have been to even dare to talk to you, we noticed it and even heard about it.

Yes, we noticed that disdain, heard that complain, felt that sudden refrain or even noticed the mocking smirks you felt were mundane.

We remember those words you said behind our backs that you felt were just mere complaints.

We choose to go where we are celebrated, not where we are castigated.

I want to know that If tomorrow, I do not own the whole world, I will still be valued as an individual in society, a man in his home, a young chap that still dreams on and hopes for better days without any involvement in crime.

My Big Question is: “How on Mother Earth would you expect me to leave this Lady in another congregation who with just one visit, began a good relationship with me, believed in me from the onset, stood by me in my hard times, encouraged me in difficult times, never neglected a word I spoke casually, etc and come for you in same church with me who always looked down on me?”

Well, if you like, let her be as short as a dwarf, as ugly as a donkey, this future of mine she always believed in, encouraged and stood for, will polish a Royal Queen out of her.

I rest my case!

~ Written by Egbuonu Victor Chukwuebuka [from Anambra State].
I am a Web developer, https://frambuk.com/web-services, a Food Flours producer, a text to speech specialist, https://frambuk.com/text-to-audio-transcription, a Google map business profile services specialist, https://frambuk.com/online-business-profile and more.

Please see all about my little beginnings at https://frambuk.com.

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Thank you all for reading.